Rules of the Pavement
- People with umbrellas the size of houses (especially those that waver at eye level and might take out an eye or two), have right of way.
- People who stare pointedly at you and do not move to the side even within one meter of approaching you, have right of way.
- People in trench coats who speak to themselves and laugh at jokes no one else can hear, have right of way.
- Cyclists can be shoved off the pavement (unless they are children – that’s just mean). Please note, this particular rule is not endorsed by any law enforcement body and although Highway Code rule 64 states “You MUST NOT cycle on a pavement”, follow at your own risk.
- People with oversized bags (handbags, shopping bags, wheely suitcases), have right of way.
- People with prams or really excited young kids, have right of way.
- People with ferocious looking dogs (and sometimes even perfectly calm looking ones), have right of way.
- People texting or surfing the web and not bothering to look up as they walk, have right of way.
- If in doubt, stare pointedly at the approaching party, do not move to the side even within one meter of the person. You WILL have right of way.